MY testimony
41 years of marriage, one daughter, and the transformative journey that proved even the rockiest seasons can be restored.
41 Years Married
Still choosing each other
“Our marriage has been one of the greatest journeys of my life.”
I am Pamela Tertiens and I have been married to my husband, Gavin, for 41 years. We have a daughter, Vicki, and our marriage has been one of the greatest journeys of my life.
But our story is not one of having had a perfect marriage. There was a time when our marriage became very rocky. We struggled to communicate, avoided difficult conversations, and often swept issues under the rug, hoping they would simply go away.
But unresolved issues rarely disappear. Over time, they began to create distance between us and we found ourselves slowly drifting apart.
Then something happened that changed the course of our marriage. A friend invited me to attend a marriage course for women.
Through that course, I began to recognize some of the ways my own attitude, actions, and responses had contributed to the difficulties in our marriage. But more importantly, I was given practical tools to help me change the dynamic — starting with myself.
41 Years of Choosing Each Other
Forty-one years is not just a milestone; it is decades of daily decisions to forgive, to listen, and to honor the covenant we made.
When I stopped waiting for Gavin to change first, and instead focused on the biblical wisdom and feminine strength God called me to walk in, everything shifted. The walls between us softened. The communication we thought was lost was rebuilt on mutual respect and deeper understanding.
Today, Gavin and I share a bond that is richer, sweeter, and more secure than when we first said "I do."
Our Daughter, Vicki
Gavin and I were blessed with our daughter, Vicki. Raising her in a home where her parents love each other and seek God has been one of our deepest joys and responsibilities.
Children don’t just listen to what we say about marriage — they watch how we treat each other in ordinary moments. Giving Vicki the gift of two parents who fought for their marriage and chose unity is the greatest legacy we could pass on to her.
Watching our family grow and thrive together is a living testament that God is faithful to restore what feels broken.
Why I Founded The Reset Wife
Going through that marriage course didn’t just save my marriage — it ignited a lifelong calling. I saw firsthand that when a woman understands God's design for her role, embraces emotional intelligence, and chooses to honor and admire her husband, the atmosphere of her home completely transforms.
For years, I mentored women privately and walked with them through the exact feelings I once felt: loneliness in marriage, walking on eggshells, wondering if it's too late. It is never too late.
I founded The Reset Wife to give every married woman the practical, biblical, and compassionate framework she needs to soften her heart, reconnect with her husband, and experience the thriving marriage she dreamed of on her wedding day.